Adolescent Substance Use & Abuse; Prepare yourself to have tough conversations with Special Guest Richard Capriola

Jackie Finneman is a 30-year family counselor turned parenting coach with more than 40,000 hours of working with children and families. She is thrilled to share behavioral strategies, supportive resources, and parenting stories from her own real-life personal and professional experiences. Parenting is a roller coaster, not a merry-go-round. We can deal with and overcome the behavior challenges within our home and set ourselves and our kids up for a successful ride. Has your roller coaster derailed? No problem. Listen in to get you and your family back on track. All right, so welcome back, No Problem Parents. I have a very special guest on today to talk about a very important topic, all things substance abuse in adolescence. And so let me tell you a little bit about Richard. Richard Capriola has been a mental health and substance abuse counselor for over two decades. He recently retired from the Menninger Clinic in Houston, Texas, where he treated both teens and adults diagnosed with mental health and substance use disorders. He's also the author of The Addicted Child, A Parent's Guide to Adolescent Substance Abuse. Welcome to the show, Richard. Thank you, Jackie. It's a pleasure to be here with you today, and I so much appreciate you taking the time to talk to me about this important topic for parents. Well, I want to let everybody know right away that they can go to help the addicted child.com to learn more about Richard and the services and resources that you

provide. Of course, I'm going to have all of that in the show notes, all the links, including your book. And we're going to get to that in a little bit, but I really want to just get right to the point and ask what substances are teens using today? We're going to get into, into the actual substances that are most common right now. And also talk about how the pandemic changed teen substance use and what happens to teens. What happened to teen substance use a year after the pandemic? You have some amazing new research and results to share with us today. Let's maybe start with what are the substances that teens are using? Well, this has been true for quite a long period of time, but teens typically are attracted to alcohol and marijuana. Those are the two primary substances that teens have been using for a long, long period of time.

You know, the percentage and the amount varies from year to year, from grade to grade. But when we look at the full range of drugs that are out there, we tend to see kids typically being attracted to alcohol and marijuana. Now, for about three years prior to the pandemic, what we had noticed was an alarming increase in teenagers vaping things like nicotine and marijuana. It was just dramatically rising for three years before we got to the pandemic. Kids were moving into getting these vaping instruments and vaping either marijuana or nicotine at really alarming levels. It was really getting very concerning for about three years, each year increasing until we got to the pandemic.

The pandemic comes along and what does it do? Well, it reduces substantially teenage use of substances across the board. And that makes sense. Kids were at home. They were pulled away from their school environment, from their social friends. They were isolating, many of them doing online school. So we did see a dramatic increase in the amount of teenagers using substances during that year of the pandemic. The pandemic itself forced the largest one-year decline in over 48 years. That's how dramatic it was. Marijuana use, for example, fell from, I think it was 35% in 2020 down to about 30% in 2021. Now, what we noticed in 2022, which is the first year after the pandemic, it pretty much remained unchanged. So that's the good news. Alcohol drinking during the pandemic fell from about 55% down to around 46%. However, in 2022, the year after the pandemic, it rebounded. The research appears to show that the one-year decline due to the pandemic in alcohol use was fleeting, basically, and probably had very little long-term effect.

Because what happened is a year after the pandemic, alcohol use among teenagers rebounded at a very high rate. Vaping of nicotine and marijuana continues to be a problem, even after the pandemic. In 2022, for example, the year after the pandemic, nicotine vaping among eighth grade students remained unchanged. It didn't increase, but it did increase among 10th and 12th grade users. And marijuana vaping a year after the pandemic increased at all three grade levels, 8, 10, and 12. So we are seeing some rebound in adolescent use of substances a year after the pandemic, which sort of makes sense because they get back into their social environment, they're hanging out with their friends, they're back in the classrooms. Other drugs a year after the pandemic, inhalants, hallucinogens, cocaine, heroin, Vicodin, all showed slight increases in 2022 over 2021. Non-prescription, non-prescription use of Ritalin and Adderall increased at all three grade levels, 8, 10, and 12. For example, I think it was non-prescribed use of Adderall increased among high school seniors from, I think, 1.8% to 3.4%. Interestingly, though, for prescribed use of the medications that treat ADHD. These are prescriptions under a doctor's supervision increased significantly in 2022. The percentage of high school seniors who were using these drugs under a doctor's orders went from 11% to 15% in one year. And what we suspect happened was

because kids were at home during the pandemic, parents noticed a little bit more that their kids had an attention deficit disorder. Because the kids were at home more and not going off to school, and many of them doing online learning, parents became more aware that there might be an attention problem for their child. And they took the child to get assessed and treated, and the child was prescribed these medications.

And that's why we saw a large increase in the number of prescriptions, the number of kids taking these prescribed drugs. So I think that might be a good thing that parents, because kids were staying at home, were able to discover that their kids might have a significant attention deficit disorder and get treatment for it. that accounts for the large increase in the prescribed drugs. Right. And I, Oh, it's such a catch 22 for me on that, because while I, I think you're right.

It is a good thing that parents noticed and were able to, to pay attention and have time and be around their child enough to, to understand that there was, there were some issues with attention. I still, it's almost bittersweet because so often the first thing we do is seek out medications, which I'm not against medication. medication. If the brain is overactive and we need to calm that down, you know, so that we can, we can feel and we can focus and we can do all those things. That, that is a great thing.

However, it's not enough. By itself, it's not enough. And I think we have to be careful with it because it really gets to the extent that the disorder has become disruptive for the child. It's certainly not the first thing parents should try. They should try other, other strategies to help their child with any type of an attention problem. But when it gets to the point where it really becomes destructive and is causing problems, then I think there are cases where medication can help. But it shouldn't be the first, it shouldn't be the go-to automatic remedy. We do enough of that already. It's like pills can solve any problem that we have out there. Right. What age is the research going back to like, when are kids starting to use? Well, this survey is a national survey done out of the University of Michigan every single year. And it's been going on for over 40 years. And they survey eighth grade students, 10th grade students, and 12th grade students every year. And they're looking for what drugs are these kids using? What do kids think about drugs and how easy do kids think these drugs are. And what the results have consistently shown is number one, these drugs are readily available on the street and kids know it. When we ask kids,

how easy is it for you to get marijuana? They tell us it's no problem. When we ask them, how easy is it for you to get alcohol? No problem. We can get it if we want it. It's easy. Drugs are easy for us defined is what they tell us. When we ask them, how harmful do you think drugs are? They say, we don't think they're harmful. We don't think they're harmful at all. We don't think drinking alcohol is a big deal. We don't think smoking marijuana is a big deal. We don't think these drugs are all that harmful. So when you combine the fact that these kids believe these drugs are easily readily available and they don't think they're very harmful, that's why we see the drug problem that we have out there right now. And I'm guessing they start, some of them, many of them start even earlier. It would be nice to see a survey starting even at sixth grade. I've had a few families I've worked with where we have, we've dealt with that. My message to parents is don't become paranoid about this issue. It can be a very frightening issue. No parent likes to think their child is or could be involved in drugs, but knowledge is power. You know, so many times when I was working at Menninger Clinic, I would sit across from a family and I would go through their child's history of drugs. You know, what drugs were they using? How young were they when they started? How often are they using? And give them a diagnosis. I would give them a diagnosis of what

we call a substance use disorder. And they would look across at me and they would say, I had no idea this was going on. Or if they did suspect their child was using a substance, they might say, I sort of thought something was going on, but I didn't think it was this bad. And the thing, these are good parents. These are good parents doing the best that they can.

They missed the warning signs because nobody told them what to look for. Nobody ever told them what to look for. So after I left Menninger, I wanted to write this resource, my book, The Addicted Child, A Parent's Guide to Adolescent Substance Abuse. I kept it to 100 and some pages because parents don't have time to read volumes of information on this.

But I wanted to pack it with information that I hope parents will find helpful and useful. And probably one of the biggest parts in the book are the warning signs that I put in there. But there's also information on how drugs work in the brain, what assessments you should get done if you think your child is using a substance. and what the treatment options are and how to recognize a good treatment program.

Because parents aren't expert in this. You know, they need information. Exactly. So let's talk about some of those reasons why kids, teens turn to substances.

Every child is different. Every situation is different. Some kids get involved with substances out of curiosity. You know, they've heard about marijuana.

What's it like? You know, they want to try it for themselves. And they either have a good experience or a bad experience. And if they have a good experience, they're likely to, they may continue.

So some of it is curiosity. Some of it is peer pressure. You know, the friends that they're hanging around with are using substances. Maybe they're smoking marijuana.

Maybe they're drinking alcohol. So they want to fit in. They want to be part of their peer group. So if their peer groups are using a substance, they're more likely to do that.

And then for some kids, not all kids, but for some kids, there's an underlying psychological reason that that child is using to medicate. In other words, it might be anxiety. It might be depression. It might be some type of trauma.

It could be an emerging personality disorder. But there's an underlying medical psychological reason why that child is using a substance to medicate. And unfortunately, sadly, a lot of times these issues are undiagnosed. So the child is using a substance to medicate an underlying issue.

When I was working with teenagers at Menninger Clinic, a lot of them were using marijuana, sometimes multiple times a day or multiple times a week. And I asked them, help me understand why you're using so much marijuana. Donna, the number one answer that came back was it helps me with my anxiety. It helps me with my anxiety.

So for some kids, there's an underlying emotional, psychological issue that that drug is being used to medicate. And it's very important that a parent who has a child that's using a substance get a comprehensive assessment, not just the alcohol and the drugs, but get a comprehensive assessment to either rule in or rule out if any of these underlying issues are affecting your child. Because if they are, those issues need to be treated as well.

You can't treat just the alcohol and ignore the anxiety. You can't treat just the marijuana and ignore the depression. You have to treat both. Exactly.

Seek first to understand that step one of no problem parenting. Why is my child behaving the way they are? Exactly. And it's oftentimes not what it seems.

So we can't just be focused on the fact that they're using and disciplining for them using, right? You know, putting consequences in place and all of that. We need to get to the root of why they feel like they need to use. And again, like you said, sometimes it's curiosity.

Sometimes it's peer pressure. Those two things have been around for years. I think we can go back, you know, hundreds of years and realize that a lot of people used out of curiosity or peer pressure. Yes.

Yes. And the other thing I tell parents is no child, no child is totally protected from getting involved in substances or alcohol. There are protective environments, but no child is totally protected. It doesn't matter where you live, urban, suburban, rural area.

It doesn't matter where you send your child to school. It doesn't matter what your level of income, doesn't matter what church you go to or don't go to. Every child is vulnerable to being trapped by alcohol and drugs. And I don't say that to be for parents to become paranoid.

You don't want to be paranoid. Knowledge is power. So the more knowledge that you have, the more you understand about adolescent substance abuse, the more confident you feel that if you have to face this issue, you can do it. You hope you never have to face it.

But if you do, you feel like you have the information, the resource, and the power to be able to deal with this issue rather than to be paranoid and afraid of it. Yeah, I love that, Richard, actually, because step two of no problem parenting is prepare for the worst. So if you're parenting a child right now, and this is not on your radar, even if it's like you're thinking there's no way my child's using, they just would never do that. Get this book, get yourself, get prepared, just in case and or to start having those conversations with your kid and know how to have the conversation around substance use and be curious with them and teach them to be curious as well.

not in a I'm going to use kind of way, but in the effects of it and how to respond to peer pressure. Understanding why they feel the way they feel is so critically important. I'm asked, well, if I suspect my child is using a substance, what's the first thing I should do? We're going to hear Richard's answer to that question in just a sec, but let's thank our sponsor real quick. H&S Heating and Air Electrical and Plumbing. They are here for you. I'm the Midwest we are about to endure a heavy snowstorm. Well guess what? H&S Heating and Air Service and Repair, they offer 24-hour emergency service with no overtime charges. Their fully stocked trucks have thousands of specialty parts and materials on board so they are ready to serve you and fix your heating problems on the first call. H&S Heating and Air, best of central Minnesota,

six years running. Call 320-654-1522 or check them out on their website hsheatingandair.com. Well, the first thing you do is have a conversation with your child. And by that, I mean, you don't lecture them. You don't argue with them. You don't punish them. You don't threaten them.

You come at it with an inquiring point of view. I'm seeing these behaviors. Can you help me understand what's going on. I'm feeling afraid that you might be using a substance. Can you help me understand why I'm feeling this way? So you invite the child into a conversation with you.

You know, we're pretty good when we talk to each other. And when we talk to our kids, we're pretty good at hearing the words they say. We're not so good at hearing the feelings behind those words. And that is a skill that every parent can practice and every parent can learn.

So that when we're talking to our kids, we're not just hearing the words, we're hearing the feelings behind those words, and we're reflecting them back to the child to see if what we're hearing is correct, if what we sense is correct. So have a conversation with your child. Now, that's likely to be a conversation that's going to go one of two ways. It's either going to blow up and the child's going to become argumentative and defensive, or you might actually learn something. But regardless of how it goes, if you're still concerned as a parent, the next thing you want to do is get the assessments done from the professionals that will give you a better idea as to whether or not there's an issue that needs to be diagnosed and perhaps treated. Yeah. I love that you say that we don't hear the feeling behind the words and I'm just going to go right into step three of change the conversation in no problem parenting. I don't do this every episode, Richard, but you're just falling right in line with the three-step process here and how we can, how we can communicate with our kids and help our kids. So change the conversation. It's not about, you know, laying down the law and letting them know the rules and the boundaries around substance use and, and what would happen if they did, but really getting to the root of, um, you know, or being curious about what they know about substances and, uh, what

their thoughts are about that. Um, and then also really identify and just check it in with them. How are you doing? Uh, how, how are, how are your relationships at school going? You know, what, what are you upset about? You know, anxiety, that's what I was going to say before anxiety diagnoses are really at an all-time high and one of the reasons why I believe that anxiety is so much higher in kids than ever is my take on it is that parents are being too nice and we're protecting our kids coddling our kids making things better for our kids not allowing them to make mistakes and when we're having a conversation with our kids we may not want to really go there with the feelings. And so we might say things that make our kids feel like we're not comfortable having the conversation that'd be too hard for us to really address or to talk about if they actually were using. We may be protecting ourselves as parents from really having those tough conversations with our kids because we're afraid for them. And then we're missing the mark,

we're missing the opportunity. But our kids really need to know that we are confident enough and capable of handling whatever their deepest, darkest thoughts are or their deepest, darkest behaviors? Well, when we ask kids, and I have this in my book, when we ask kids, what is it that keeps you from talking to your parents about things that might be troubling you? The response that comes back is a fear of being judged.

They fear being judged by their parents. So I think parents can go a long way in terms of developing this trust relationship with their child by doing some of the things that we talked about earlier, having open communication, helping your child understand that you're there to listen to them, not to lecture them, but to listen to them. by having conversations from an inquiring point of view. If you're concerned about your child's behavior, I think you should share with that child why it is concerning to you and how it affects you as a parent.

Let them see that you're human. Let them see that you have fears about what's going on. If they're using substances, let them know that you're afraid that something could really happen to them. Help them see that you have feelings too and that you're comfortable talking about those feelings.

It's difficult for parents to do that because parents want to give the appearance that they're infallible, all knowledgeable. They've got all the answers, but that's unrealistic. Kids need to see that their parents are human just like they are. And they need to understand that it's okay to have the feelings that they have and to trust that they can talk to their parents about those feelings.

But that all gets back to communication style and being able to develop an inquiring point of view and having these conversations with your child. It takes practice. We're not perfect at it, but the more apparent practices, the better they become at the skill. Well, and your book covers this.

And so I really encourage parents to go out and get the addicted child is the name of the book. We've mentioned that already, but it's a parent's guide to adolescent substance abuse. It's not just the book though. It also comes with a workbook, right?

There is a workbook for parents because I wanted something that would help parents. So I developed this short workbook that has exercises in it for parents, an opportunity for them basically to journal some of their feelings, like how is your child using a substance? How's it affecting you? So it's a short, very short workbook that I think is best used in consultation with a good friend, with a counselor, with a parenting coach, with somebody that they trust that can give them feedback on what they're writing.

So the journal is for them to use, but I think it's best used with somebody else that they trust that can give them feedback and have a conversation about what they're writing in the journal. I think that's the best use of it. But I wanted to provide that resource for parents. The book itself is educational.

The workbook is for parents to help them work through these feelings that they're having. yeah so it's not just the child's anxiety or the child's reasoning for using and all of that but it's also the anxiety in the parent yes and your health this book is helping with the parents anxiety around substance use so if you have a child that's already using and you're well you you know they are maybe you've sought treatment for them maybe they're in treatment maybe it didn't work first time around or you know maybe it wasn't successful um and you're still you're still searching for how to best help your kiddo, this is a great resource for parents.

I think it's important that parents have knowledge. Knowledge is power. This is one resource that very quickly will bring them up to speed on adolescent substance abuse, including how drugs work in the teen brain. Parents need to understand that their child's brain is in the process of developing.

It doesn't get developed fully until around age 24, 25. So there's a brief chapter that explains how drugs work within the brain. And I think it's important that parents understand that. But the bottom line is knowledge is power. Don't become paranoid about this issue.

Learn as much as you can, because I think it will help you feel less afraid, less paranoid, and more empowered to deal with this issue if you have to. You may not need it right now, but keep a copy of the book on your bookshelf. You might have a friend that needs it at some point, But hopefully you'll feel a little bit more confident about this issue and more prepared to deal with it if you have to. Be prepared.

What is your worst fear around substance use? You know, parents, what's your worst fear? Don't wait for it to happen and hope it doesn't happen. Get educated so that, and again, this is no problem parenting.

When the problem comes around, we say, hey, I'm prepared to deal with this and overcome this with my kiddo. I think you feel more confident. Absolutely. And less afraid.

Absolutely. Absolutely. become the confident leader that I say our kids crave us to be. Thank you so very much, Richard, for being with me today. I appreciate it. Thank you, Jackie. And thank you for your contributions to the conversation. And I hope everyone that listens to our conversation walks away with more information and hopefully feel a little bit better prepared.

Thank you for tuning into the No Problem Parenting podcast. Join Jackie next time for more tips, tools, and resources that will help you become the confident leader your kids crave you to be. Who do you know that we could support on their parenting journey? Like this podcast, subscribe, share, or leave a review of the show. Your support of the No Problem Parenting podcast pays it forward and helps us help more families.

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