Teens and Adults: How to stop suffering from negative thoughts, feelings, emotions and beliefs with Special Guest Julian Robus

Hey, welcome back. No problem, parents. Are you or your teen at your wits end, suffering from negative thoughts, feelings, emotions, and beliefs? Is stress, anxiety, depression, anger, regret, self-doubt, or mind chatter holding you back, destroying your happiness, impacting your health, your sleep, your relationships, or your work? And are you longing to feel good, sleep well, smile more, and just be able to enjoy life? Well, my guest today is going to help you. He's found fast, easy, and reliable techniques. Let me tell you a little bit about Julian Robes. Julian knows the depths of despair and the journey to recovery intimately.

At the age of 45 in December of 2008, he found himself on the brink of hopelessness. In a world rife with quick fixes and distractions, Julian took a different path. He never believed in the crutches of alcohol and drugs, but he also didn't find success in therapy. So he embarked on a quest to discover a natural way out of his anguish. Julian knew there had to be an alternative, a lifeline that didn't require pharmaceuticals or traditional counseling. He cast a wide net exploring various avenues for healing, from neuro-linguistic programming, or NLP, to emotional freedom techniques, EFT, from life coaching to Reiki, even venturing into the world of hypnosis, but it wasn't until 2010 that he stumbled upon what he would call proper or real meditation. Meditation became the cornerstone of his transformation, the key that unlocked the door to a brighter future. The impact was so profound that Julian was inspired to share his newfound knowledge with others. However, he was steadfast in his commitment to only teach when he had achieved a place of genuine well-being himself. Seven years later, while on a walk with his loyal canine companion, Julian's empathetic nature shone through. A neighbor confided that his wife was grappling with mental health issues, and without hesitation, Julian extended a helping hand.

Through just nine happiness recovery sessions, this woman experienced a remarkable turnaround, reclaiming her joy and resilience. Now Julian Robis is on a mission to empower struggling adults and teens with the life-changing techniques that brought him back from the brink. As a stress reduction, mindfulness, and meditation instructor, he guides individuals towards instant relief, the clarity to banish negativity, and the restoration of happiness.

Julian's promise is clear. You'll start feeling better in five minutes, or your session is free. He embodies the belief that within each of us lies the power to overcome, heal, and find joy once more. Julian's journey from despair to enlightenment serves as an inspiring testament to the transformative potential of holistic approaches to well-being.

And he's here to show you that there is indeed another way, a way that leads to a life filled with happiness, hope, and renewed purpose. If you've tried therapy, if your teen has tried therapy and it hasn't worked for you, this is another option. So stay tuned, parents. This is a short and sweet episode.

we had a little bit of audio issues, but I think we've cleaned it up enough to put out this quick episode. Hey there parents. Thanks for listening to the no problem parenting podcast. Are you ready to become the confident leader? Your kids crave you to be, are you losing your crap on your kids, yelling, giving in and exhausted at the end of every day, you are already a good parent.

And I'm sure you've sought advice from friends or family. You've read books on your child's specific behavior problem. Maybe you've even signed them up to see the school counselor or an outpatient therapist. But despite your efforts to find the right person or thing that will help, your family is still struggling. You're tired of pretending everything's okay. Well, if your confidence is shot and you feel like you're failing your kids, but you also don't have a ton of time or money, register to become a no problem parent for just $50. It comes with an app so you can listen to the tips and tools just like you're listening to this podcast. You can start building confidence in your parenting immediately, whether your child is a toddler or all grown up and still living in your house. Don't make this parenting gig harder than it needs to be. Become a no-problem parent today. All right, Julian, welcome to the show. I'm excited to share Happy Onion Living with my audience today. Hi, Jackie. Thank you for having me. It's an honor to be here.

I think there are many people listening today that can relate to feeling like they've tried everything and then some including drugs, alcohol or suicide attempts even. Tell us a little bit about your journey and your story. Yeah, so it was never meant to be a business. It was only ever me trying to get rid of my own stress, anxiety and depression. And for as long as I can remember, there was an inexplicable profound sadness and I just couldn't, I didn't know why. I had next to no memory of my childhood, which was always a puzzle to me.

And even though from the outside, I was very successful. I had a fantastic, well-paid job, beautiful wife, two wonderful children. We lived by the sea in a little house. I had no mortgage, no financial issues.

But in 2008, it had become so – I just was at my wits' end. I just couldn't cope. And out of desperation, I went to see a psychic. I've never done that before.

And without me saying a single word, she explained my entire life in an hour. And she knew so much that she couldn't have known. That gave me a bit of confidence. And she said, look, I know you hate your job and I know you hate your relationships and everything else.

Just leave it alone. It's going to sort itself out. And that was December 2008. and in March 2009 I was working for Siemens up in Birmingham which is about a five-hour drive from here and I was waking up in the hotel one morning and you know when that when you're not quite awake but not quite asleep that little bit in the middle and I was just sort of coming to the stress and anxiety and the depression like oh come on not again and I had a huge meeting that day and I was designing special vehicles at the time and got up dragged myself into the bathroom to get shaved looked in the mirror zigzaggy lines migraine I thought oh great that's just what I need right so I went to get my my migraine homeopathic remedy and my wife had given me a new briefcase and I swapped everything over but forgot to move that because it was in a secret compartment so that for me is three days in bed being sick and everything else you know migraines are like and i just couldn't do it i had a big meeting that day so i thought i have to i'll have to try something so um i just bought a new training course called hypnology and it was about self hypnosis so quickly sat myself down tried to do this and i thought hang on a minute so if i'm being hypnotized who's doing the hypnotizing right that's the first thing that came to the mind and i thought no just get on with it and um i hypnotized myself and all of a sudden i became

aware that i was the observer of the body with the headache and it's like okay that's a bit odd how can i be the observer of the body with a headache and i gave the instruction and the migraine just went and i remember sitting there thinking shit this works um and then all of a sudden i was overcome by this incredible warmth and feeling of love like you've never felt in your life and i became the observer of the observer watching the body with a headache and there was total silence and peace and bliss and just one thought came up what am i not who am i what am i and i came out of it and i went to work and from that day everything started to change um long story short i've had five shifts in awareness or in consciousness um and the last one was what they call satori which is self-realization and the the people that started to find me i'm no good at marketing i don't have a book out yet or anything people started to find me by the most weird coincidences for friends of friends or just finding me on the internet somehow and when i started speaking with them i found that they were all in the same place i was they got to the place where they didn't know how to carry on and they all get unbelievable results in a ridiculously short time and what i've managed to analyze is that the mental health world the psychology world they're trying to fix a broken or dysfunctional mind but the mind is the problem

and the minute you push the mind to one side and you start to realize that you need to manage the mind which is something nobody ever teaches us and the minute people start to understand what thoughts and feelings really are why they come up how to get rid of them so thoughts feelings emotions um everything changes because we are born happy and then all these layers are thrown on top of our happiness um we lose our identity we lose our authenticity right we've gone around in the world faking happiness all the time and inside we're in bits so people come to me and within a few minutes we get to the real root causes of what's going on now i call it dysfunctional ancestral programming because this is all goes into a certain age when we have no choice it just goes in and then once people see that this is just programs and there's a there's a real me and And then there's a mind me, a false self, if you like.

And they learn how to quiet the mind within a few minutes. Within two, three, four minutes, you can just shut the mind up. And then we empty what I call the volcano. We take the negative energy, because that's all it is.

Whether it goes into stress, anxiety or depression, it doesn't matter. Once it's in your inner volcano, so to speak, it's just negative energy. And we empty the volcano. I teach people how to stop stuffing the volcano so they don't go back to the same place they were in.

And then I teach them how to smolder the volcano. That's how to let all this negative energy go without ripping somebody's head off. And then you feel guilty because you ripped somebody's head off. So you're restuffing the volcano.

So it's a vicious circle. So once we understand what thoughts and feelings really are, why they come up and how to get rid of them. and then I give people the tools to stay calm, happy, and handle life's ups and downs with ease. That's it in a nutshell.

Even though mental health is more accepted now, there's so many resources out there, and yet it's very telling that even with all the resources, anxiety, depression, and suicide rates are staggering. Yeah, it's frightening. But the problem is, Jackie, they're not understanding or dealing with the real root causes. so I'm an engineer by trade right I was designed special vehicles um you can never first rule of engineering you can never solve a problem you don't understand so all these people I'm sure they're all they've got the best will in mind right um they've got a qualification they've not been through it themselves um what I accidentally started teaching in 2017 came from my own experience right i'm feeling terrible my mind won't shut up i'm depressed i'm anxious how do i get rid of that and bit by bit over nine years it took me to work it all out um and because i'm an engineer i keep excellent notes so i kept notes in case i regressed and in doing so i accidentally formed a program that others can follow so it's a essentially a three-step system it's how did i get into this unhappy mess how do i get out of it and how do i stay out of it the biggest problem people have they want to feel better fast and that's exactly what my techniques do um i've always had this theory that i've worked with people right up to the age of i think 72 is the oldest i've worked with and i always had this theory that um

the younger you are the less of these layers that you've got right so my business is called happy onion living because we all want to live happily but we're programmed like onions and i had a 19 year old young man come to see me recently and the whole world was on his shoulders um i think his um his dog had died he'd split up with his girlfriend and it was the anniversary of his grandmother's funeral or something and he just couldn't cope and we did one session right hour and a half I think it was perhaps a bit longer but it gave him the tools to take the pressure out of his system and get his happiness back so that's when I realized that this is as powerful for teens as it is for adults and um yeah it's just amazing to see people change I've just had a 30 year old young lady um she's had anxiety since she was 12 years old she's had therapy counseling medication she was just about to go back on medication again she just had a baby nine weeks ago she couldn't be with her own baby because she was in such a distressed situation in her head so she had constant supervision her friends were staying with her to help out bless them and she came along here she said i've tried everything nothing works and in the first session she probably took 80 percent out of her volcano the second session she emptied the other 20 percent um and she's had three sessions she's completely turned her life around it's key that you're helping people turn their mind off

the racing thoughts the negative thoughts the spiraling that we do correct and the thing is I liken it, I help people understand it by using the stories, right? So what's your favorite TV film or program? What's your most favorite thing? Oh, I used to just love Everybody Loves Raymond. I don't watch a lot of TV now, but Okay, so when you're watching that from an engineering perspective, I take everything back to the engineering smallest level, there's you sitting in front of a box and you're seeing pictures and you're hearing sounds right right so you're the observer or the witness or the noticer of the sounds and the pictures right at no point do you start believing you are the tv right right so how is it we believe that we are our thoughts and feelings and emotions well because you feel like they're just that's who you are that's a part of you yeah so we've been trained that we are our thoughts and feelings but you can't be something you're witnessing by default right you don't start believing you're the tv so you're the witness of the thoughts and feelings and that's the starting point the minute you do that you're just separated from thoughts and feelings are no longer oh my thoughts are driving me crazy no there are thoughts arising and i'm noticing them okay then all you need is a simple technique to shut the mind up which takes two or or three minutes once you start to get that peace that inner peace in a peacefulness whatever you

want to call it that's your starting block for understanding what thoughts and feelings are why they come up and they actually come up to help us not harm us and how to get your your inner peace back because happiness is a side effect of being peaceful inside health is a side effect of being peaceful inside success is a side effect of being peaceful inside right because if your mind's going 300 miles an hour how are you going to concentrate on anything so everything improves from inner peace and from reconnecting and living from your true authentic self so many people are faking happiness and trying to keep up with the joneses instead of just being themselves because nobody's ever taught them how so your program your system can be done in one session it can be done in five sessions yeah i say to people people need time for it to sink in they try the techniques um they come back they got some more questions and each week they improve right but as i said that young man the whole world was on his shoulders all he needed to do was understand that he's not his thoughts or feelings how to shut the mind up and take the pressure out of his volcano so one session and he was done. He may come back. I don't know. But I always recommend five, but it's now the last three or four clients. We're down to three sessions and they've absolutely nailed it. They're learning how to do this mindfulness practice a couple of times a day

for five to 10 minutes a day, twice a day. They're super simple techniques. They immediately take the pressure out of your system. You start feeling better within a few minutes. So I start them off on five to 10 minutes a day and they work up to 20 minutes twice a day.

But some of the techniques, you don't have to take yourself out of the world and meditate. You can do them as you go. And that's the beauty of this. You can calm yourself while still going through the day. You can calm yourself while driving, right? You can calm yourself while whatever you're doing. You just have to have these super simple tools that anyone can use.

all right so let's kind of break it down a little bit so so whether you call it stress anxiety depression emptiness sadness guilt regrets overwhelm and happiness it doesn't matter that's nine things right what that really is all those nine things are actually only negative thoughts and feelings that's it so it's actually only three things for a start and when you look at it under the microscope all it is it's energy that's stuck in your nervous system and the minute you take that energy out of your stuck you unstick yourself if you like you take that negative energy out of your system your happiness naturally comes back because we're all born happy right look at a puppy running around the garden you don't have to teach it to be happy it's just happy right um look at the lambs spring lambs they're jumping around skipping around the fields with their brothers and sisters jumping over logs nobody taught them how to be happy, they came out of the box like it. Well, guess what? So did we. Look at the average three,

four, five-year-old. You don't have to teach them how to be happy or adventurous or curious about the world. They're full of it. And then the world quickly gets hold of us and knocks the stuffing out of us. And we are taught how to be unhappy. So all we're really doing is unlearning unhappiness.

Yeah, I think I've talked to you about this before. It reminds me of the song by super tramp the logic song where they talk about when i was young i thought that life was so possible you know magical wonderful and then they then they sent me away and taught me how to be logical sensical practical you know and that he's talking about kindergarten like when i sent you to school yeah like society has stolen our happiness um and never gave us the tools to get it back well Well, guess what? I've accidentally invented the tools to get it back.

It's buried beneath the nonsense that the world throws at us. So your website is happyonionliving.com. All of your information is there.

People can book a free 20 minute consult with you just to learn more about how you how you can help them. If somebody comes on the call, Jackie, we have a quick conflab about where they are, what's troubling them. I immediately give them a free technique we use together right there and then and we help them feel better in a few minutes once they see that this actually works it's not just a load of bullshit um they feel better it's then up to them if they want to carry on with it and have some sessions with them but most of the people that feel it they're in because that's the first thing I've ever found that actually works and it works fast. That's so wonderful. And again, this is all based on yours, your experience, the things that worked and that helped you and you pulled out some of those things. And then you've created this happiness recovery and stress-free living program. The other thing that I really love about your work, Julian, is that you're not,

like you said, you don't have a book out yourself, but there were many books, many resources that helped you to really gain this inner peace and you list those on your website as as well correct yeah yeah so the books that i found i've taken everything i learned from all the masters i kept playing with it and using it on myself and refining it down until it became a super simple practice and if it wasn't simple or it wasn't effective i threw it out and just went to the next one so nine years of painstaking trial and error if you like um to get a collection of i don't know perhaps there's a dozen things in there a dozen techniques that take the pressure out of the system and effortlessly restore genuine happiness reasonless genuine happiness and gives you the tools to handle life's ups enjoy life's ups and handle life's downs with ease Nobody teaches this stuff.

This is the missing toolkit for staying happy and enjoying life. Well, and I think there's lots of modalities. There's lots of people teaching with the intent to do this. What I love about your program is it's really quite quick.

You're not stringing people along. You're giving them the support and tools and help they need right away. Yeah, yeah. I give them the tools to sort themselves out, right?

Who wants to go to a shrink for 20 years? I had a lady recently, she's been in a shrink for 20 years. every week blah blah blah we get talking and she's stressed and she's anxious and depressed i said well you want to sack him she said what do you mean i said well if you've been with him 20 years and you're still like this he's obviously no good um right then she got the she got upset with me and never spoke to me again but she couldn't handle the the truth i wasn't being horrible i was trying to help the poor woman um and tell her that she's using the wrong tools for the problems that she's struggling with. Yeah, you really, that's true. This is key. You have to want to feel better. A lot of people, unfortunately, they're carrying around their I'm depressed banner or I'm anxious banner, right? And that's how they get their attention. The people that find me and work with me, they're done with all that. They just want to be happy and enjoy life. And they're ready to do whatever it takes to do it.

And it's almost like the universe rewards them. Well, you've made a stand. So, okay, here's the tools to feel better. And they come along.

We do the first session, an hour and a half, perhaps two hours. I don't just stop halfway through when time's up. And they walk away with immediate coping skills to feel better now. And then they implement stuff over the first week or two.

Then they come back. We do a second session. and they incrementally improve. But the most important thing, Jack, is they understand how it works and then they're self-sufficient.

When they're feeling anxious, they just do the pyramid hands technique and the anxiety disappears within seconds. When they're feeling stressed, they do the hands up, hands down technique. Within a couple of minutes, they're feeling they can perhaps go from 10 to 2. I've had people go from 10 to 0 and they open their eyes after we do the technique and I say, right, how stressed or anxious are you now?

And they say, what stress? It just completely wipes the slate. And the other thing, I'm turning this into a movement for youngsters so that kids learn this and then teach their friends. Because that's what's going to make the difference.

You're at school, you see one of your friends, he's stressed or anxious. Are you okay? No, I've got this. Hey, why don't you just do this technique with me?

And within a couple of minutes, a teenager can teach his best friend how to get rid of anxiety, how to get rid of stress. And that's my mission to change the world, to give kids, teenagers, empower them to change the way they experience life and make it a happy, happy experience. I love it. I love this mission. I love everything that you're about.

Parents and teens or parents, if you have teens, if you yourself are struggling with anxiety, depression, unhappiness, just that feeling of sadness on a regular basis, negative thoughts spiraling in your head, children or teens with anxiety, depression, ADHD, negative thoughts, isolating in their room. I highly recommend that you reach out to Julian. It will not take a lot of your time. It does not cost a fortune. Julian is very reasonably priced. You really have nothing to lose when you connect with Julian. And so I just highly recommend that you do so.

and take control of your mindset, of your mind, your thoughts, your feelings. You're going to be able to dissolve that negativity, stay naturally calm, happy, confident, content, and productive. Julian, thank you so much. I look forward to our continued relationship.

I appreciate you being on the show with me today. Jackie, it's been an absolute honor and a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me on. And yes, if I can help any of your parents or teens, feel free to give me a shout.

I'll do whatever I can to help you live a fun, happy life. All right, parents, that's it for today. Make sure you head over to the website, noproblemparents.com.

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For now, hugs and high fives. You got this. you